5 טעויות קריטיות שהורים עושים בפגישה עם עו"ס לקראת עריכת תסקיר בעניין ילדיהם הקטינים

At Arthur Shani Law Firm, we dedicate significant time to prepare for the review meeting, recognizing that meetings with the social worker concerning the minors and their best interests are extremely crucial for winning the case of the parent we represent. This preparation helps avoid pitfalls due to unupdated or unprofessional professionals and mismatch between authorities. A typical example is the holiday schedule in the new format of the review, which may not align with actual holidays in various systems. Why shall we leave a chance for future conflicts when one can request the social worker to adjust the schedule to the real schedule?

What is a review?
A review (in Hebrew: Taskir, the Israeli version of the American “Custody Evaluation Report”, the Canadian “Family Assessment Report”, the British “CAFCASS Report”, and the Australian “Family Report”) is a document constituting an opinion with recommendations (which can be directly used in court) about the welfare of the minors: dividing parental responsibilities (formerly “custody”), dividing parenting time (formerly “visitation arrangements”), schooling, residence, and more.

Generally, in legal proceedings concerning minors, when there's a significant conflict between parents and no consensus on dividing parental responsibilities, including parenting time including overnight stays, residence, schooling, medical care, etc., the court (either rabbinical court or family court) will order a review by a court appointed social worker. This review will express her opinion and recommendations on where the minors' welfare lies, distinct from the parents' welfare and desires.

Unfortunately, most judicial figures tend to rubber-stamp the social worker's recommendations in the review, so thorough preparation is crucial. Our firm often encounters cases where a parent, previously represented by another attorney, suffers significantly from inadequate preparation for the evaluation review, leading to adverse outcomes.

Actually, it's a judicial warrant to write a review and submit it to the court, directed to the court appointed social worker in the Department of Social Services of the Ministry of Welfare in the local council where the minors reside.

It is the social worker's responsibility to be the extended arm of the court, providing an accurate and comprehensive picture of the family situation before and during the conflict, and incorporating the minors' welfare into all relevant considerations.

In writing the review, the court appointed social worker will collect information from various sources like educational health and welfare institutions, therapists, and other community members, including checking criminal records and consulting with professionals and experts.

In addition, the social worker will conduct meetings with both parents together and separately, observe each parent's interaction with the child(ren), including separate home visits to each parent's residence. This is where you, the parents, can influence the review, making preparation for the meeting crucial. Usually, the recommendations in the social worker's review play a decisive role in swaying the judicial decision, as it is considered expert opinion. However, remember that the review is not definitive, and the final decision-making discretion lies solely with the court.

Why is it important to prepare for the review, and how can you turn it to your advantage?
Preparation is vital and effective in nearly every aspect of life. It fosters a sense of personal well-being, instills confidence, and sharpens focus on the goal – as the goal of each and everyone may be.

Preparing for the meeting with the court appointed social worker is the best way to lay the groundwork for a “review in your favor”. This means a review based on recommendations that align with your wishes and goals set at the beginning of the proceeding. And beyond that? A mistake due to misunderstanding, lack of knowledge, or unawareness can transform the review into a recommendation that restricts one parent's time with the children.

The 5 Most Common Mistakes in a Meeting with a Social Worker Prior to a Review
1 – Skipping a preparatory meeting with a family and divorce lawyer regarding the reliefs requested from the court
The first mistake parents make is choosing a lawyer not specialized in family, divorce, and inheritance law. It's crucial to select a precise professional who will guide you through this challenging time and lead you to the desired legal result. An experienced family and divorce lawyer will prepare you for the meeting and direct you towards a productive interaction with the social worker for the review writing, using their professional experience and familiarity with the process. Remember – the lawyer will represent you in front of the court, but you will have to handle the social worker yourself.

2 – Being unclear about the main goals and desired reliefs from the court regarding the children

It's important to approach the meeting with the social worker with a clear goal, thinking ahead about the recommendations you wish for. Clarify with yourself, together with your lawyer, your primary goals set at the beginning of the case according to the reliefs you sought. For example: joint custody, a particular division of parenting times, with or without overnight stays.

In this way, you'll come to the lawyer's meeting goal-focused, successfully conveying a precise and unified message about your wishes, perspectives, and desires for the future of positive parenting for your children. All while anticipating the other parent's arguments, and how to frame them correctly before the social worker.

Note: Be sure to read the request for the review! Does it include a request for a custody recommendation? You should know that determining a “custodial parent” is not common today. You must be vigilant about this and have the right to ask the social worker not to address this issue.

3 – Failing to establish a good relationship with the court-appointed social worker

As previously emphasized, the court-appointed social worker plays an extremely crucial role in the court's decisions.

Cooperate as much as possible with the social worker and extensively share details about your children, your relationship, hobbies, joint activities, and memories that demonstrate your special bond before the conflict and how you envision the day after. It's a mistake to think the social worker can infer behaviors, feelings, and thoughts. You need to actively share and engage.
Discuss any difficulties or concerns, bringing them to the forefront to give the social worker a real picture, allowing for important emphases and suitable recommendations in the evaluation review – to avoid the need for a supplementary review, which would take additional couple of months to receive.

4 – Losing focus and being unable to filter out background noise

Remember, amidst all emotional upheaval, it's crucial to stay composed and maintain respectful communication with the court-appointed social worker. Focus on your relationship with your children and filter out distractions that could undermine your main goal.

Behave respectfully, from arriving in clean, orderly attire to showing respect to the social worker, the other parent (even if they are expected to be your ex), and your children. Avoid provocation and excessive reactions.
Refrain from disparaging remarks about the other parent and maintain neutrality regarding them.

Have you detected unprofessionalism by the social worker? State your case, stand firm, but do so politely.

Be aware of gender bias. Sadly, we've seen many instances where a parent, be it a father or mother, is discriminated against based on gender and the social worker or legal system's outdated views on parenting from a certain gender. Sometimes a parent demands extensive parenting time to reduce child support obligations or attempts to undermine the other parent's role out of irrelevant revenge motives due to unresolved marital conflict. It's crucial to be vigilant in these situations and act wisely in real time.

5 – Failure to inquire and focus on weaker points/arguments of the other party

Try to anticipate the other parent's potential arguments or weaknesses, analyze them, and prepare to respond with an alternate explanation and your version. This approach, known as “conscious coping”, significantly boosts your success chances.

Summary
Approach the meeting with the social worker seriously, as family court judges and rabbinical court dayanim often adopt the social worker's review recommendations or expert opinions – verbatim. Those who come prepared for the meeting with the court-appointed social worker, having had a preparatory meeting with a family and divorce lawyer, who take the effort to gain accurate knowledge and prepare for every scenario, shall witness positive outcomes and succeed in protecting their interests and those of their children.

This guide is a public service from the Department of Litigation Family Dispute Resolution at Arthur Shani & Co. Law Firm.

Arthur Shani & Co. – a leading law firm in family, divorce, and inheritance law, alongside family wealth and business management fields – rated by Israeli leading market rankings DUN'S 100 and CofaceBDi.

This should not be construed as legal advice. To receive personally tailored advice – simply leave your details at the end of the page, and we will contact you promptly.